Too cute to ignore…

Often one partner in a couple feels frustrated, disappointed or even enraged with the other, because they feel like they’re not given the attention they need. 

If you’re that person, you may walk around feeling confused and hurt. 

Your partner, on the other hand, might feel like they’ll never get it right.

We call the attention seeking partner,  “OverDependant”*. The OverDependent’s behavior stems from a need in an early stage of development that didn’t get met. 

When we’re young and completely dependent on others for the fulfillment of our needs. But if our caregivers, for whatever reason, aren’t able to meet our needs, we can adopt an OverDependent coping strategy. 

This substantial mismatch in the level of attunement needed to flourish at this young age leaves a wound. 

If you suffered from such misattunement, you probably developed a strategy of showing your dissatisfaction, much like a young one would cry or tantrum to get their caregivers attention. 

The good news is that you haven’t given up and you know you have needs (some of us don’t!).

The beautiful thing about intimacy and s-ex is that it can be a wonderful way to work through your wounds. 

It’s about filling your core desires in a CONSENSUAL way.

When you ask someone who is OverDependant what they want to feel when they are intimate, they’ll say:

  • Cared for, maybe even babied 

  • Attuned to 

  • Wanted and desired  

  • Adored and admired 

  • Special 

  • Pampered 

  • Loved unconditionally

If your partner is OverDependant and you want to turn them on, figure out how to make them feel like that. 

Believe me, it works! 

If you’re OverDependent, search for a partner who has the space and ability to adore you without getting triggered.

If you’re already partnered and you know this is what you need you might need to teach your partner the exact words and actions that would fill the above list. 

This is where I come in. I can teach you how to produce and direct your HSM* (Hottest S-xual Movie) which will include all the elements needed to give you what you want!

*Somatica method terminology

Odelia Shargian