The largest sex organ in your body is…
Did you guess the answer to the question in the subject line?
It's your brain :)
The more I talk to women about their sexuality, particularly around menopause, the more I hear about low desire.
Low desire, around menopause is a real thing, with some medical solutions. However, there’s also a lot you can do with the generous help of our own bodymind.
But for this to work, you have to care that your desire is low.
Maybe you think this is just the way things are now. And while you CAN live without it, you deserve MORE!
In addition to the mental, spiritual and health benefits you get from being connected to your erotic energy, desire can make your life more meaningful and exciting.
It can change your experience from waking up in the morning and feeling meh to feeling like you can’t wait to start your day!
But because we’re socialized to downplay our sexuality, we can’t expect desire to just be there if we don’t set an intention to INVITE it.
Desire needs to be cultivated. It needs to be kindled like a fire. It literally turns off if you don’t feed it.
And once it’s on, like a pilot flame, you want to make sure it stays on continuously so you don’t have to start over when you want it again.
Start by fiercely deciding it’s ok for you to put your attention and energy on your desire. Spend more time engaging in erotic experiences without putting any undue pressure or expectations on yourself to feel amazing.
Erotic activities include:
Engaging in sensual experiences like dancing, listening to music, eating an exquisite meal or dessert, taking a shower/bath, swimming in the ocean, getting a massage and allowing yourself to really bask in the pleasure these experiences create in your body
Thinking about your favorite sexual encounters and what you liked about them
Fantasizing
Reading/watching erotic material
Self-pleasuring with ample time and space to explore with or without toys
Low pressure partnered sexual play
The bottom line? It takes practice.
Just like you don’t expect yourself to be able to run a marathon if you’re hardly moving your body on a regular basis, you can’t expect to feel ecstatic if experiencing your erotic energy is not part of your routine.